Tuesday, November 20, 2018

Sweet Christmas

       It's monday and I woke up blinded by white. While sleeping, a fine layer of fluffy snow laid itself quite majestically on the, until then, green field. Christmas is around the corner and I can't stop myself thinking about distinct dishes, sweet bread and mulled wine or for those who want something stronger, palinka.

The loudness is unbelievable this morning in our house, our children's excitement making them especially loud and my husband's patience ran thin but even so I couldn't stop my mind from savoring memories of my favourites: cookies and chocolate.


And if we are already talking about Christmas let me tell you more about our habits of this holiday, here in this Transylvania Land and maybe you will think  about joining us.

From every house are not missed some soupe or borsch (for the quests who mind their calories), aperitives whith bacon and home-made sausages, sarmale and all sorts a meat delicacies and if you are vegan, fear not, as we already dropped the idea of meat.

To our home now it begins with salads and different sea-food, fish and other numerous ingredients I don't remember.

Cake and sweet bread whith nuts, cinnamon and vanilla, hazelnut and almonds, these are my favourite part of my Christmas, oh and the fruits also, of course!

On every small street in the villages waits are wishing you a Merry Christmas with their charols.

So as they say :

 Hai la Maramu!

Sunday, November 4, 2018

Welcome home




       I don’t want to describe the Romanian medical system as any other system it has its ups and downs, but at that moment all I wanted was to go back home, to my rays of sunshine, to my children, cause I was too disgusted by this system and I was ashamed that I was a long time ago part of it, or tried to be.

 Everything revolved around money, after six weeks of hospitalization on 5 December I signed the discharge papers, I couldn’t stand mentally in a hospital anymore, I couldn’t stand to just lay uselessly in bed and watch how my husband loses himself from watching me lay around anymore.

 Even though I couldn’t move at all and my husband was exhausted from staying in a chair 24/7 on 6 December we arrive home with some presents for our kids (in Romanian culture is Saint Nicolas holiday).



And so a new chapter of my life begins…

Friday, November 2, 2018

Helplessness




       Fallen on the humid ground, I remember looking at the sky and thinking that it was a nice warm autumn day, the sun was shining and the sky was a brilliant blue.
       Even to this day I hear the drumming of hooves and the sound of the chariot’s wheels drifting into nothing. My husband’s roar of despair and the darkness in his gaze, the fear and the groans of utterly pain, it shook me out of my stupor, I almost came alive, he was trying to take me in his arms, to embrace me as close as he could, he was raising slowly my head.

‘Don’t…please, I can’t move my legs…I have spine trauma’ he could hear me barely whisper. Agonizing flashes that I barely remember go on: the ambulance came with a young nurse, who was more panicked than me, she didn’t really know what to do, she barely got my neck brace on and we go to the hospital.
       Between salons and doors at which I needed to wait the doctors finally decide to keep me at a hospital a night to see if I survive.  A single nurse approaches me all night trying to keep me calm, trying to encourage me ‘remember what you need to live for’.

 The next day my husband appears threatening trying to rationalize with the doctors, pleading for me to go to a better hospital, to Cluj Napoca. I was supposed to go with a helicopter, the situation was a critic one, but in my place goes an 80 year old man with a broken femur ( apparently it was more critical, he was the father of a senator). I wish to say my trip on the ambulance approximately 125 miles, and maybe it appears that it was made quick and easy but let’s remember we are in Romania, so the trip wasn’t slick and nice at all. In fact it was hell for me, the inflatable mattress that was supposed to keep me from feeling the bumps of the road was punctured so it staid deflated all trip. Next up awaits me hellish days that sometimes I wish I could forget, because of lack of cash, the hospital decides that until I have 3800 Ron cash to pay for the titan system that I needed, I won’t be put under surgery. My mum manages to arrive from Spain with the money, Saturday night, but the surgery won’t happen until Wednesday.

Days and nights of despair, hopelessness and trembling fear pass.

 I know what will happen, but do you want to?

Thursday, November 1, 2018

Broken wings




         Seven years ago, in a beautiful autumn day somebody decided to tame my life, hopes and dreams were shattered but let me tell you...

      I was in our farm, we were supposed to reap the harvest and bring home some hay. Because we were pretty new in this domain, we didn't have the instruments necessary for all the work we were supposed to do. We only came from Spain back home, in Romania and we decided to ground ourselves more with the nature, so we decided to build our own little farm.

     Although I am a nurse, I didn't find a position without bribery and the farm was the only possibility for me to bring money in our house. As I was saying, that day we were bringing home some hay, with the help of our neighbour, that had a chariot, which would help us bring it all. We were at the end of this proccess when one of the chariot's horses gets spooked and runs and I couldn't get away fast enough.

     The result of a stupid accident from where I get spine trauma and not even now do I know the verdict. Will I be able to walk again? Nobody had an answer.

      Therefore the follows a husband and a wife without the ability to walk and four children, the younger having only a year.

     Time doesn't wait for us, wounds heal and life slowly goes on.


Did I capture your attention? There is so much more...

Wednesday, October 31, 2018

My Story

       


       Since an early age I liked to travel, to go on trips: deep in the forest or up a mountain or simply just walking. I remember, I dare to call it, an adventure from childhood. I was at my grandmother's old house, in the countryside,
I remember I absolutely hated to stay rooted in one place or to do common things, but I was supposed to help. That day I was supposed to watch over a cow, so it wouldn't stray away, aaaaaaaall day long, while the other children were playing and swimming in the nearest river. That cow was a little crazy but I didn't expect for it to just appear in front of me and what threw me off, literally, was that it actually took me with its horns and threw me exactly in the thorns. Ouch, I still remember that there wasn't a part of my skin that didn't have this minuscule wood thorn in it. Forgetting the pain or trying to, I took care of most of them and I left the cow but that wasn't all, I left my grandmother's place without even telling her anything as I didn't see her and I didn't bother looking for her. I went all the way to my other grandmother, I don't even remember the actual time it took me to get there, but I know that it was a long way (16 kilometers or 10 miles) may I remind you that I was a child and I went on a walk, alone through three villages, until I arrived in the city to my salvation. Since then I think something in me sparked at the idea of walking, of exploring. If it were somebody else maybe they would have hated the idea of it, but I wanted more. Not the pain, but the adrenaline of just getting away from my problems even for a short amount of time. It amazed me how you could just get up and go and discover, to just travel away from your worries and nightmares.
Fast forward in 1998 I married and a year later my only daughter Mihaela brightened my life, she was my little ray of sunshine as she was a little bundle of happiness with bright eyes and little blonde curls. Since then life took me through different countries, but two of them I knew more of, because of our prolonged stay: Lisbon, Portugal, where we lived a short period of time (God, as I rewind these memories, the longing of seeing them once more takes over my heart) then eight years we lived in Spain, where we visited and we took trips frequently balancing them with our work. In that time I had my two boys, Raul and Tudor, in that order, the light to my happiness. After long eight years we decided that we must come back to our ancestral home, to raise our kids with the same love for our country as we had when we grew up, but a surprise for us was our last child, Seraphim. Now my four children were my pride and joy, they grew up and we actually went through so much these last 7 years, you won't even believe it! But I think that is another story, for another time.


See you soon!

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